4.27.2009

I DID IT I DID IT

I finally cleaned out my email inbox! OMG this has been weighing down on my for maybe two months. So totally absurd that I could be weighed down by my email inbox, but true nonetheless! As my number of unread emails bounced between 200 and 400 I was starting to go slowly insane and constantly anxious that those messages held important information that I was just simply ignoring.

In the end, I didn't miss much by reading only the subject lines. After a valiant struggle, I have zero unread emails. ZERO.

Ok, whoa. I got two emails while writing that short paragraph (see why this is so hard for me??). I have now dealt with those two emails and I am back to zero. WHEW.

In other news: I finished our wedding invitations today. For whatever reason we have ended up sending them out in waves as we finished gluing them together. The final batch is enveloped and stamped. Another huge weight off of our shoulders. To be totally fair and with the giving credit where it's due stuff: Lion did the vast majority of the work.

It is always amazing to me how good it feels to accomplish tasks you've been putting off. Why is it that I can be smart at some things and yet rendered so miserable by procrastination?

Similarly, there are about 100 pairs of scrubs bound for a medical school in Nepal currently hanging on my clothesline. When was I supposed to get those washed? Hmmm.... December?

4.21.2009

Medical School? Check.

I finally began feel like I am in medical school about six weeks ago. Before that I had certainly felt like I was in school. Make no mistake, there was a lots of studying and a veritable mountain of molecule names and body parts to commit to memory.

In terms of intellectual stimulus, the whole thing had been underwhelming. Intellectually hard, yes, by nature of the sheer and insurmountable volume of information to commit to memory, but infrequently inspiring in an academic sense.

And then came physiology. I should have known that I would like it. The physicsesque prefix, the geeky "ology" suffix all added up to the most fun version of "The Way Things Work" I've engaged in. Unlike tinkering with my bike or pulling apart old telephones, considering physiology was about the machine that is always with me. Though a lot of the inner workings were what you can't see, things like respiration and heart rate I could feel in myself. Suddenly I was reading notes on the train with one finger on my carotid and holding my breath or thinking about the catecholamine release and resultant speeding of my heart brought on a sudden blaring announcement over the loud-speaker. There was just something about it. Like the inside of a clock, it's just plain neat.

Physiology came as a relief to my overly self-analytical self. A relief to the constant question: should I be doing this? I haven't wondered if I really want to take care of patients, to be involved in the nitty-gritty of people's lives at their moments of encountering illness, life and death, in solving the puzzle of maintaining their own health. Each Wednesday afternoon we tromp out to one of the myriad of hospitals in this flagship city of health care to practice our patient interview skills. In those moments, the act of doctoring has clearly presented itself as a good path. But here I was, months into school, and I kept thinking "didn't I used to really dig science, too?" It's OK, I believe now, that cell biology, molecular biology and anatomy, weren't awe-inspiring to me. The study of how our body works on a macro scale has the most clear relevance to the practice of medicine, and so I was thrilled that I liked it the best. The last month we've sauntered into immunology and pathology. Though In some ways a step back into molecule hell and the tyranny of three letter acronyms, it is made up for by the fact that we are now learning about diseases. And diseases always feel relevant.